OKLAHOMA CITY-
State Superintendent Ryan Walters has been a controversial figure since his election to office back in 2023, with critics accusing him of dismantling Oklahoma education, while supporters applaud his dedication to keeping the liberal agenda out of Oklahoma classrooms.
In recent months, an unexpected rumor has begun to spread across both sides of the aisle, calling into question the citizenship of Superintendent Walters. Many are speculating Mr. Walters may not be from Oklahoma… or even Earth. According to growing online chatter, the Superintendent is allegedly a citizen of Atlantis, the long lost underwater civilization.
We reached out to OSU Professor of Extraterrestrial Theory and Oceanic Ethics, Dr. Amy Fisher, for her take about the possibility of Mr. Walters’ origin.
“There have been eyewitness reports of Mr. Walters appearing to have scales under his suit jacket, and allegedly, his skin turning green at the touch of water. I’m not willing to speculate without a personal examination, but I will say those are the classic signs we would expect to see in someone with an Atlantean heritage.”
Checotah native Paul Hookandsinker, self proclaimed MAGA enthusiast and fish whisperer, weighed in:
“Look, Atlanteans, they’re just city fish, and I ain’t never seen a fish I couldn’t catch. Since Mr. Walters is a godly MAGA man as myself, I will let it slide..for now. As for you liberal fishes, y’all swim careful. Y’all better not show your ugly heads in Eufaula, I’ll tell you that much.”
We reached out to Superintendent Walters’ office for comment, but we were told that the Superintendent was “currently away on an extended ocean expedition” and will be unavailable until further notice.
